At Camp

The gentle sounds of the coming night were greeted by the soft crackles and pops of the small bonfire. Nettle sat on a log she had pulled in close, using a flat stick to scrape honey and honeycombs into a large, lined bag. Between the scent of the fresh snow, the raging bonfire, and the sickeningly sweet honey, the smells were akin to heaven. Toxin lay sprawled across a log, peacefully snoozing away. His entire body was covered in welts, but for the first time in hours, he didn’t feel them. Nettle eyed him up with sympathy. Bees hated him and he hated bees. For some reason they always seemed to attack him specifically, even though he was the one trying to avoid the bees rather than assault the hive. Nettle had always been told that bees could smell fear, but she had no idea how true that was.


Avalanche was in a much more fitful sleep, but she was dozing in and out. Her brow was down-facing and creased deeply as she glowered at absolutely nothing. She must have been dreaming about something unpleasant. If Nettle had to guess, it was probably about bees. Naruto and Nettle were the only ones that hadn’t been assaulted by the insects. As selfish as it was, Nettle thanked the gods for sparing her today. Her eyes flicked upwards. Stringy, thin clouds covered much of the night sky, but a few resilient stars twinkled bright enough to shine through. Naruto and Cocheta were laying next to each other, almost frighteningly close to the fire. Naruto was sleeping as still as a rock. Cocheta was having significantly more difficulties, but she hesitated to move, lest she wake up the little golden toki.


Whiplash had been staring at the fire unblinkingly for several minutes, cursing herself for not being able to fall asleep. All she could think about was how much her stings hurt and how tired she was. Somehow, she was too tired to sleep. It was maddening. Every few moments she would lash her tail or dig her claws into the soil. She wanted to be at home in her own bed. The tawny half-mane thought about the smells of home - but she hadn’t experienced it at its best since the illness began to spread. Its stink permeated everything. It sank into the blankets, into the trees, into the ground. Home smelled slightly off now. It wasn’t even that the smell of Black Lung laid overtop of everything else. It somehow managed to work its way inside of everything. Nothing smelled quite right anymore.


Eventually, the restless tokota rose to her feet and gave a long stretch. She thrust her forelegs out in front of her as far as they could go, sticking her butt in the air and unleashing a massive, tongue-curling yawn. Dark circles underlined her eyes, her steps slow and tentative as she wandered over to Nettle. Nettle wanted to reach out and pet the tokota, but her hands were so sticky with honey that she was certain that her hands would come away covered with fur. Fur isn’t a particularly flavorful addition to honey. Whiplash set herself on her haunches as she looked over the others.


To her surprise, Cocheta very slowly stood up as well. Careful not to disturb Naruto, she wiggled her way out of his snuggling grip. Once she was certain that he wasn’t awake she padded over to where Nettle and Whiplash sat and parked her butt not far away. Whiplash gave her a nod of acknowledgement.


“Can’t sleep?” Cocheta asked curiously, keeping her voice low.


“Nah.” Whiplash flicked an ear out of irritation. “I want to, but I just. Can’t.”


“I know that feeling.” Cocheta sympathized. She found her eyes wandering to the others, a pang of jealousy hitting her as she saw Naruto and Toxin sound asleep. Avalanche was much more fitful, but at least she got a little bit. “Is it the stings?”


“At least partially, I think.” Whiplash conceded. She flicked her eyes towards Cocheta. “But there’s something else, too. I don’t know how to describe it.”


“I’ve had more than my fair share of indescribable feelings as well.” Cocheta cocked a smile. “You wanna try to describe it?”


“Hmm.” Whiplash contemplated this for a moment. The words that came to mind made no sense to her, but she decided to give it a shot anyway. “The only way I can think to describe it is… I don’t feel like I’m home. This is my home, I’ve lived here for much of my life now. But… With this sickness, it doesn’t feel like it anymore.”


“Mm.” Cocheta grunted. “That makes sense to me.”


Whiplash’s eyelids fluttered in surprise. “Does it? It sounds like nonsense to me.”


“Well... I mean, it smells different. It looks different. It’s not like an earthquake, but it rearranges everything all the same.” Cocheta pointed out. The dire turned her head towards Whiplash. “Relationships change. People disappear. No one feels the same. It’s not just you.”


Naruto’s feet started twitching, as though he was chasing something. Whiplash felt a smile tug on her cheeks. Toxin hadn’t moved an inch for so long that part of Whip was worried he had died - but his flanks still rose and fell evenly. Avalanche was the complete opposite. She had twisted herself into an impossible, uncomfortable looking knot. A scowl was still etched into every feature of her face. The rhythmic scraping of Nettle’s stick on the honeycombs calmed Whip down.


“You must be eager to get back home, too. To get back to normal.” Whiplash smiled shyly at Cocheta. “We’ve only known you for a day and we’ve all almost died in the war against bees.”


Cocheta chuckled softly, huffs of hot breath evaporating into smoke. In spite of the intensity of her eyes, there was a gentleness too. “You haven’t been bad company. If we pass through this way again and want to see you, would that be alright?”


“Always.” Whiplash nodded. Her heart swelled just a tiny bit. It made her proud to make others feel comfortable. “If you need anything, we’re here. Avalanche has the most pull with the pack out of all of us - if you’re worried about anything at all, just ask for her. She’ll fight for you.”


“Thank you. I will remember that.”


Naruto popped out of a deep sleep, leaping several feet straight up. All of them physically flinched at the sudden movement and loud noise. Once he landed, he looked around thoroughly. He was visibly confused. Toxin grumbled something and flopped onto his other side, but Avalanche squinted at the toki until he lay back down. The lack of sleep was wearing thin on her patience. Avalanche was a lot of things, but patient was not one of them. This only made things worse.


After a few minutes of awkward silence, Cocheta spoke up again. “So… do you think you’ll ever leave this place?”


Whiplash was taken aback by the question. She had to think about it for a long moment. “No. I don’t think so.”


“What if it never feels like home again?” Cocheta pressed. “What if the disease never really goes away?”


“Then…” Whiplash frowned. It was a thought she wanted to avoid even more than the Black Lung itself. “I have no idea what I’ll do. But I can’t leave my family, and I can’t leave those who need me.”


“Well…” Cocheta said hesitantly. “If you need my help, head far to the west. If it ever gets to that point, we’ll be there for you.”